Clear Communication + Courteous Listening = Healthy Marriage
A Word from Jason & Ros
Greetings Friends, and welcome to October! At Built On Covenant, this month we’re focused on encouraging and empowering couples to practice effective communication and listening skills. Learning to communicate clearly and listen attentively to your spouse is essential to building healthy, strong marriages!
In fact, did you know that communication breakdowns between married couples are the leading cause of divorce in the U.S.? According to recent studies, well over 60% of marriages report that communication was the grounds for divorce. Over our 38 years of knowing one another, we’ve learned the hard way about how miscommunication and “selective” hearing can wreak havoc on loving relationships. That is why we’re sharing these truths and gold nuggets on communication and listening with you, hoping to inspire you to chat more considerately, lovingly, and respectfully.
“My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to become angry,” James 1:19 [NIV]
Just DO It: Practice These 5 Communication & Listening Tips!
1- Talk with God
- Practice “being still” before God during your personal prayer time.
- Stay silent to learn how to listen for His response.
2- Pray Together
- Practice praying as a couple, talking with God, and listening.
- Start by choosing a mutual time for prayer that works for both of you. Try 1x/wk, and increase over time.
3- Read Scriptures Together
- Begin sharing your thoughts about certain passages.
- Discussing Scripture with each other improves communication and listening.
4- Write It Out!
- Write letters, notes, lists, etc. to get thoughts and feelings onto paper.
- Benefits to help you:
- Better understand and handle emotions
- Control your narrative
- Cool down
- Effectively respond/express thoughts and ideas
- Listen to your spouse better
5- Give Full Attention
- When your spouse is talking, give your full attention: body, heart, and mind.
- Remove all digital distractions to assure them of your attentiveness and respect.
Need a little outside encouragement with communication and listening? We’re here to help you start the conversation!
Featured October Devotional
When Sincere Friendship Comes Before Love!
This month’s featured devotional reminds us that the strongest marriages begin as strong friendships. Learn about Isaac and Rebekah’s love story and why the pillar of friendship in marriage still matters today!
We often believe that erotic love and passion can carry our marriage; however, these emotions will never be strong enough to stand alone.
Bottom Line: To experience a flourishing marriage, we must build it on a foundation of faith, sincere friendship, mutual respect, and also genuine enjoyment of each other’s company.
Podcast Feature
Jason & Ros on the Naked Marriage Podcast!
What happens when you mix marriage ministry mentors and friends with a guest invite to be on their podcast? You get faith, fellowship, and fun conversation! It was both a delight and an honor to be on the Naked Marriage podcast with Dave & Ashley Willis, our Marriage Coaching Academy cohort leaders and friends.
We cannot thank them enough for their kindness, encouragement, and inspiration to continue moving forward in marriage ministry! So, take a listen!
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The Community Spotlight
Patrick Shares His Testimony!
My wife and I met Jason and Ros at the Dave and Ashley Willis Marriage Coaching Academy. We were paired with them for several activities and quickly grew to care for them as a couple. They share our spiritual beliefs, and Theresa and I both saw that they have a real gift for helping other marriages.
From time to time, Theresa and I need a coach. A husband-and-wife team is a powerful setup for couples-to-couples work. Men feel represented. Both of us leave with something clear to work on. I would highly recommend Jason and Ros for couples coaching. They are spiritually grounded; they have a lot of lived experience to share, and their desire to help is obvious. They have helped Theresa and me tremendously.
Addressing Communication Issues Through Marriage Coaching w/Jason & Ros
Our coaching sessions and resources address common barriers like miscommunication, emotional triggers, or feeling unheard, guiding you both toward healthier, more connected interactions.
Have you ever considered marriage coaching? Discover how we can support you in strengthening your relationship while also getting reconnected. We’re here for you!
💌 Your Love Letter Challenge for the Month:
Start Communicating & Listening!
As always, we want to encourage you both in God’s Word. His Word and your prayers are the best way to begin communicating and listening, first to Him, and then to each other.
Your Challenge: Find ONE scripture passage in the Bible that speaks to a current situation or issue that you’re dealing with in your marriage. For example, ‘We still argue more than listen to each other when we disagree.’ Your passage could be James 1:19.
- First, read the chosen passage together.
- Pray together about the Scripture, asking for help and guidance on how to better listen to each other.
- Be silent together before the Lord for 3 minutes and listen for what He speaks back. Then share your thoughts, being careful to listen to your spouse when they have the “floor.”
Could your marriage use a little enhancement or enlightenment? Consider marriage coaching and consulting with Jason & Ros. We’re here to help. Even more, your first conversation is free!
